When gathering information, ask more open questions (who, whose, what, when, which, why, and how). They will be perceived as less threating and more collaborative while getting you more helpful information.
Negotiation Blog - Attitude
Film Award for Best Negotiating Practices
By Thomas Wood
- responding to her offer in a way that makes it difficult to explore Mattie's interests,
- negotiating against himself without waiting for a counteroffer when faced with Mattie’s various BATNAs/bluffs, and
- declaring multiple times that this is his final offer.
- an assertive but defensible opening offer,
- persuasive analogies,
- a strong BATNA, and
- a tapered concession pattern.
Mattie has almost no power in this negotiation, but she leverages something much more potent – her skill as a negotiator – her true grit.
Happy People Make Better Negotiators
By Marianne Eby
Inc. magazine contributor Jeff Haden gives us a list of “10 Things to Stop Doing Right Now” to be happier. We couldn’t help but point out that if you subtract these 10 things from your negotiations, too, you’ll be happier AND a better negotiator.
Haden's top 10 subtractions on the road to happiness are no-brainers to master negotiators, so we wanted to highlight the biggies from a negotiator’s perspective:
1. Blaming - Take responsibility for your part. If your customer hasn’t kept up with its volume commitment, ask yourself – did you set the bar too high, have you trained their users on your service, what part of this is yours?
2. Impressing – It’s important to sell value – yours, your company’s, your product and service. But if all you do is promote you and yours, you will miss the golden opportunity to learn about your counterpart.
3. Interrupting – Even new negotiators know to ask a lot of questions, but it doesn’t pay off if you interrupt the answers. And fake listening doesn’t count – master negotiators listen with sincere curiosity!
4. Controlling – Even when you have all the power, trying to control the outcome of negotiations is counter-productive. Controlling the discussion or outcome ensures that you will miss opportunities to talk, to find hidden value for both parties, and thereby create a sustainable and viable agreement.
5. Dwelling – Haden tells us “the past is just training.” Negotiators, even the best, make mistakes. They do their homework and they diligently follow the best practices, but to get the best deal they are creative risk takers. Asking questions has risks. Suggesting options has risks. Showing your cards has risks. And with the risks come some mistakes. But master negotiators don’t dwell; they turn mistakes into lessons.
6. Fearing - For negotiators, fear is what keeps us from asking for what we want, the nail in the coffin for achieving a beneficial agreement. Think of the "big ask" as a way to start the conversation. If your request is defensible, then you can confidently ask for it.
Don’t be afraid to negotiate for what you want! You’ll be happier, build stronger relationships, and achieve mutually beneficial agreements.